Hear Dr. Victoria Lee tonight at 8 PM PST.

November 16, 2015

NEWS FLASH: RADIO SHOW TONIGHT WITH DR. VICTORIA
To hear Dr. Victoria discuss sacred sexuality on Porch Talk, follow the link below at 8:00 PM Pacific Standard Time, on Monday November 16
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/mandmporchtalk/2015/11/17/sex-relationships-sex-therapy


The Joy of Waking Up

November 6, 2015

Dear Visitor,

Reviewing the statistics for this blog, I’ve found that more than 94,000 have visited since I began it. You–visitors from many states and countries–are my community, my fellow travelers on this journey of developing our spiritual lives as deeply as we can, and of trying to make a difference on this planet through our compassion and commitment to service.

On this early November night, I want to share some of the grace that has been showered on me along with a major health challenge. This confrontation with my mortality woke me up. I began to see–really see–the beauty all around me. So much beauty in the human faces in my life–such kindness, compassion, humor, sweetness. That human beauty is everywhere, not just in the faces of those I dearly love, but in the eyes of the grocery store clerk, the bank teller, the neighbor across the street.

Since I became a vegetarian, I find such enchantment in animals. My little dog makes me smile first thing every morning. Waiting patiently for me to open my eyes, his tail starts to wag as soon as my eyes meet his. “Wake up and live! he says, “and let’s play now!”

And then there are the children in my life–the grown ones and the little ones and the medium size ones. I adore them all. Not least or last, my true love smiles at me across the table while we feast on a meal centered on organic vegetables. My past loves linger always in my heart as well, not with longing, but with appreciation.

Outside my door, red and yellow roses bloom still, competing with the deep magenta of the bougainvillea. Rumi says there’s beauty in every rock and flower, and so it is.

I start and end my day with music–songwriting, singing, playing guitar. I am blessed–overwhelmed with grace.

I do not take this grace lightly. The suffering of Syrians and others in war zones, of the often innocent young men sent to fight in these wars, refugees with no homes, prisoners of war, and of conscience, the bereaved and the lonely and the depressed–none of this escapes me. Some form of this suffering comes to all. If you are reading these words by accident right now, please take heart. There are those who care and will help. Call Suicide Prevention, call a rabbi, priest, minister or therapist. Call a friend who cares. “Ask and you shall receive,” say the holy words. But you must ask!

Rumi says:

Lo, I am with you always.

You promised that, and when I realized it was true,

my soul flared up. Remember, and be back with the Friend.

Blessings to you dear visitor!

–Dr. Victoria Lee


“Let the beauty we love, be what we do.”

April 3, 2015

Dear Visitor,

Reviewing the statistics for this blog, I’ve found that more than 83,000 have visited since I began it. You–visitors from many states and countries–are my community, my fellow travelers on this journey of developing our spiritual lives as deeply as we can, and of trying to make a difference on this planet through our compassion and commitment to service.

I write this on Good Friday and the first day of Passover. Ramadan is six weeks away. So many worshipers, singing different verses of the same song. And of the many who do not identify with any organized religion, most are seekers too. As Rumi said, “I see the same altar in temple, mosque and cathedral.”

Here are some of Rumi’s lessons for us all:

• We are here on earth for the purpose of soul-growth.

• We are capable of profound joy and compassion in virtually every circumstance.

• Pain and loss can be the gateway to our greatest joy.

The last point touches me in a new way as I–like many of you–face a serious health challenge.

Rumi also says:

Lo, I am with you always.

You promised that, and when I realized it was true,

My soul flared up.

Remember and be back with the Friend.

===============

Please visit me at my website: http://www.coupleswisdom.com

Blessings to all!

 


Fearless Dying

August 31, 2014

Death has become impossible to ignore. Three close relatives, two friends, the spouse of an old friend–all gone before their time just this year.

The Persian poet Rumi said “Don’t worry old earth, you’ll get your sweet morsel soon.” He was fearless about dying, and tried to give his followers comfort by letting them know there was nothing to fear. In the three years I spent writing The Rumi Secret, my deep immersion in Rumi changed me. I lost my fear of death, and later became convinced that there is something beautiful on the other side of it. This is not a belief, not a dogma, but a knowing that is beyond a need for intellectual justification.

Some will find this fanciful wish-fulfillment. At the other end of the continuum, some will hear this as a vote for their own belief system. For me it is something else–a kind of grace–amazing grace–an inner knowing, inner peace. I’m in no hurry to leave this beautiful/terrible/unfathomable world, but when I must, I expect to go without fear. I am passionately attached to those I love, and I have not yet learned how to come to terms with the prospect of interrupting those connections. I trust that I will learn that profound lesson in due course.

Meanwhile, I live in an ocean of gratitude for too many gifts–joy, hope, love, laughter and music, music, music. I must not give the false impression that I am too evolved for anxiety, anger, moodiness, selfishness, or the ability to make still another foolish error in judgement. I regret to report that I am not above any of those emotions and states, not even above an occasional and ludicrous attachment to having my own way, no matter what. And yet–and yet–I am profoundly grateful for it all!

And here is my gift to all who read this. Actually, it’s Rumi’s gift– his words:

Inside, you are sweet beyond telling.

There is a sun in everyone.

I become a mirror which cannot close its eyes

to your longing.

My eyes wet with yours in the morning light.

My mind always giving birth, always conceiving,

always in the 9th month.

And then an empty sky full of homage and praise.

And everything is soul and flowering.

Everything is soul and flowering.

 


Forgiveness Is the Answer

December 7, 2013

Dear visitor:

In honor of and as a tribute to Nelson Mandela, I’m reposting part of what I wrote recently about him:

In his years of imprisonment and tremendous challenge, Nelson Mandella found inspiration in these words by Ernest Henley:

Invictus

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul. 

I love the words “…the menace of the years finds, and shall find me unafraid.” I relate to these words.

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In light of President Mandela’s death yesterday, what I find particularly moving is the example of forgiveness he set for us all. A man who can forgive decades of imprisonment and go on to inspire people around the world should give us pause when we think of the often petty resentments we so often hold toward those we feel have wronged us.

Someone wrote that the best way to make the world better is to make yourself better. It would be hard to find a better example of this than the one provided by Nelson Mandela.

As I’ve suggested elsewhere, let us all honor this great man by forgiving someone (or a whole group) today.

Please visit me at http://www.coupleswisdom.com.

Blessings!

 


My Unconquerable Soul

November 30, 2013

In his years of imprisonment and tremendous challenge, Nelson Mandella found inspiration in these words by Ernest Henley:

Invictus

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul. 

I love the words “…the menace of the years finds, and shall find me unafraid.” I relate to these words. Like Rumi, Mary Oliver, and other wise souls, I have been blessed  with the loss of my fear of death. Here are some words from a song I wrote:

“By grace I went to the other side of dying. The beauty there is more than we can dream….”

This does not mean I’m in a hurry to leave this precious life, and those who mean so much to me. On the contrary, I’m living a life dedicated to optimizing my health and longevity. To me this means, eating organic, vegetarian food and exercising every day. The flesh of animals who have often been tortured before being slaughtered inhumanely has no place my table. See the DVD Food, Inc. if you want to know the truth of how animals are tortured and “processed,” before the pieces of their bodies appear in packages at the supermarket.

The same goes for dairy products. Although the organic ones involve less cruelty, milk products have many potentially negative health effects. In THE CHINA STUDY, two highly credentialed researchers believe that milk protein contributes to the progression of cancer.

Protein itself, according to the authors, needs to be severely limited in those who have cancer. They recommend no more than 5% of total calories from protein, and avoiding animal sources of protein altogether. THE CHINA STUDY is important reading for anyone who has cancer or loves someone who does.

This discussion is very different from usual focus in this blog. But since this information has come to my attention, I thought perhaps someone who wouldn’t see it otherwise would find it here.

Blessings to you, dear visitor. Please visit me at www.coupleswisdom.com.


The Joy Inside Every Human Being

September 29, 2013

Joy Is Your Essence

As translated by Coleman Barks, Rumi says:

In the last hour before morning
lover and beloved awake
and take a drink of water.

She asks, “Do you love me or yourself more?
Really, tell the absolute truth.”

He says, “There’s nothing left of me.
I’m like a ruby held up to the sunrise.
Is it still a stone, or a world made of redness?
It has no resistance to sunlight.”

This is how the ancient Sufi sage Hallaj said
“I am God,” and told the truth.

Therefore be courageous and discipline yourself.
Completely become hearing and ear
and wear the sun ruby as an earring.

Work, keep digging your well.
Don’t think about getting off from work.
Soul water is there somewhere.

Submit to a daily practice. 
Your loyalty to that is like a ring upon the door.
Eventually, the joy inside will open a window
and look out to see who’s there.

As always, Rumi urges us to seek the relentless joy that dwells within us all. We get there through daily practice, through intention, through service, and through understanding that we are in the process of discovering our own essence.

Blessings to all. If you seek more joy, read Rumi every day for 100 days.

For those of us who are blessed with a passion for music, poetry, dance or other creative arts, may we affirm to everyone we know that (especially when offered in service to others)  these arts provide a direct path to joy.

I close with these words from the Dalai Lama:

“We are visitors on this planet. We are here for ninety or one hundred years at the very most. During that period, we must try to do something useful within our lives. If you contribute to other people’s happiness, you will find the true goal, the true meaning of life.”

Please visit me at http://www.coupleswisdom.com

Facetime appointments with Dr. Victoria Lee are described there.